ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize