honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
