And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
