these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Randomize