I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize