idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I wish my penis had an off switch
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
North Korea, Best Korea!
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
