when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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