The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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