I accidentally burped into my bong.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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