This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
