did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
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You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
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I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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