She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
