You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
