I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
