just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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