11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
