Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
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