Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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