i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I am naked and annoyed.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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