your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize