i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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