It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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