Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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