i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize