ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
