singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
