Sry I called you an 8
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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