I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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