What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize