But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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