If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
