You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
