..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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