Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
