so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize
