i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
She needs sedatives and a leash
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
This can only be settled by a dance off.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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