I cockslap morals
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
