she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize
