I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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