this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
