The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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