So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
