I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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