Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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