problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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