It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
