thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Green mimosas i think yes
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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