in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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