idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize