Got a toothbrush?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
