I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
